Friday, March 4, 2011

What Would Snooki Do?

Well, it’s been a rough week, folks.  Don’t get me wrong. I’m a tough cookie.

I’m not one to run away from adversity. Hell, I usually run towards it. I love a challenge! Tell me I can’t do something then watch me prove you wrong.

But there’s only one person in this world that can tear me down. Only this man can shatter my world again, again and again. He can intimidate me one second then make me feel sorry for him the next.   

Earlier this week, he shattered my world… again.

I’ll spare you the dirty details of this divorce in progress. The wounds are still fresh.  

As this Hell Week winds down, I’m self-evaluating, self-reflecting and self-medicating.  Mmm, Moscato…

But as I sit here typing with one hand (wine glass in the other), I can’t help but wonder…

What would Snooki do?

C’mon, we all know who she is. With the exception of my mom, who’s probably asking herself, “What the hell is a Snooki?”
This is a "Snooki."

I know, there are no rocket scientists on this show – not even a “sandwich artist” – and yet we watch. Fist pump!

So what brings me to wonder about this self-proclaimed “Guidette” and how she would handle my problems?

For starters, she’s a train wreck and right now my life feels as if it’s careening off the tracks with no brakes. 

This week, my divorce in progress has me in the middle of another dilemma. That’s right… We got a “situation.”

With the exception of getting piss-ass drunk on a beach, getting arrested and “smushing” everything with a pulse, me and Snooks do have one thing in common…drama!  

This is also a "Snooki."
But like the Energizer Bunny (with boobs and big hair), the Snook just keeps on going… and going… and going…

I, too, fall down from time to time, just not literally. OK, there was that one time in South Beach…

So how does she do it? How does she keep picking her sloshy ass up off the pavement time after time after time?

Which brings me to my original question…If faced with my “situation,” what would Snooki do?


  1. I can honestly say I've never seen an episode of Jersey Shore, and yet, I still know who Snooki is. At first I likened her to Kim Kardashian - famous for no good reason. But Kim stays in the spotlight and now even has her own perfume line? Snooki, on the other hand, remains trashingly-infamous and will likely stay that way for some time. What would Snooki do? Like you said, she's probably go to the beach, drink way too much and smush with anyone in sight. I advise against using Snooki as a role model.

  2. LOL! No way is she a role model. Just thinking out loud... Fascinated by the fact that no matter how many times she falls down (or gets beat down), she finds a way to get back up. As one who's been punched in the stomach this week (figuratively speaking, of course), I don't know how she does it. Although someone recently pointed out that the $30k per episode she's making must make it a little easier to get up in the morning. *sigh*

  3. Again - super-funny! Another great post...I don't watch Jersey Shore, but it seems like Snooki is everywhere.

    BTW, I am passing along the Stylish Blogger award to you! It’s a lot of fun so stop by my blog to get the button and to participate.

  4. Amanda, I'm speechless and very honored! I'm not sure what to do with it, but I will read the rules and continue the tradition. Well, I'll do it when I get back. I'm taking the lil one and her friend (she says she's psychic) to the movies to cap off the lil one's birthday weekend. I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried...

  5. Hello, hopping by from Bloggy Moms to wish you a warm welcome. LOL brings back memories!


  6. Thank you so much for the warm welcome! Still finding my way around the site. Now following your blog... :)

  7. my ex does that same exact 'intimidate-then-make-me-feel-sorry-for-him' thing... we had an angry house before the kids and i left, too. why on earth (may i ask?) would you go to an amusement park with him? i can't and don't trust my ex anymore and i refuse to "hang out" in his company as much as possible.

  8. K: I'm so sorry you had the "angry house" experience as well, but good to know you got out. Re: your amusement park question - During a custody hearing a few days before, the judge said he saw no reason why my ex shouldn't be allowed to attend the party. *sigh*

  9. OH it was a party... well that stinks. i understood it as a "sure, come along, whatever..." thing. things would be so much easier if there were no 'angry' to have to worry about. i am actually jealous of other moms who are divorced simply because their husband fell out of love or only extramarital things happened ... that's a slice of pie compared to worrying about the ex's 'angry' :(

  10. K: I thought I was the only one who felt that way. I once told him, "This would be so much easier if you had a girlfriend."

    And yes, it sucks when you have to worry about the anger. I feel my body tense up every time I have to talk to him. In person, via phone, doesn't matter. I get this anxiety thing in my stomach.